The Debutante
by The Mouse Avenger
Summary: Fidget has a little lesson in manners. Read & review, please!


**THE DEBUTANTE**

AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is a story I got an idea from at my cousin's wedding engagement party. (Like I said, you can get fanfic ideas in the weirdest places.) Hope you like it!

All GMD characters are (C) by Disney. The following characters belong to me & shouldn't be used without asking me first:  
Monsieur Victor Claudius  
Gramsy  
Donald Trumpet  
Willy & Ginny Rochester  
Luciano Mozzarello  
Sophocles Braveheart  
Cecelia Green  
Princess  
The Rochester Family  
The American Revolution

Enjoy the story! (And don't forget to read & review!)

* * *

It was a sunny Friday afternoon in Mouse London. In the locker-lined hallways at Basil Of Baker Street Jr. High, Fidget The Bat & Cecelia Green were chatting merrily over the newest joke Fidget had learned.

"OK, so I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith, right?" Fidget said, smiling broadly. "I told Olivia about him, & Livvy asks, 'What's da name of his other leg?'" Fidget laughed, but it was Cecelia's own giggles that made the scene enjoyable for him. "Oh, Fidget," the girl bat said, tousling her boyfriend's hair, "you have such a great sense of humor! _Muy bien!_" In response, Fidget blushed. "I do what I can, Cecelia..." the little bat said with a sheepish smile.

Suddenly, the bell rang. Fidget waved & bid "farewell" to Cecelia as he made his way to his final class for the day—Science & Chemistry.

* * *

In the classroom, as students watched intently, a mouse was busy writing on the blackboard, a single piece of pale yellow chalk in his paw. The mouse was in his mid 30's, with drooping pink ears & whiskers, warm yellow eyes, lines on his elliptical face, & a pink nose. He was dressed in a light-blue shirt, brown loafers, & a dark-blue vest with matching trousers.

The mouse's ears perked up a bit as he heard the sound of the door opening & a familiar peg-leg clopping upon the floor. He turned around to see one of his beloved students, none other than dear old Fidget, entering the room & sitting down at his desk, right next to Ratigan.

"Ah, Fidget, _bonjour _again!" Monsieur Victor said with a smile. "You're just in time for our review of the Periodic Table Of Elements! I suppose you've studied?"

"I've done more dan dat, Monsieur Victor!" Fidget replied proudly, beaming. "Wanna hear me recite dem aloud for da class?"

"Of course, Fidget!" Monsieur Victor said merrily in his Tony Jay-type voice. "We'd love that, wouldn't we, children?" When the multitude of students made their unified reply, Fidget went up to the front of the classroom, straightened his cap & scarf, cleared his throat, & began to recite the Periodic Table. What was unusual about the event was that Fidget was actually _belching _out each & every element. But by the time he got to "iron", Monsieur Victor grabbed the bat's lips, shouting irritatedly, "Fidget, that will be quite enough!"

"What did I do wrong, Monsieur Victor?" Fidget asked in a tiny voice.

"You managed to disgust the entire classroom..." was Victor's dry reply. Indeed, the children were groaning with dismay at Fidget's crude review of their lesson.

Fidget was about to argue, but Monsieur Victor handed him a lavender slip of paper & pointed to the doorway as he said, "Not another word, Fidget. Now go to the office & take some time to think about your crude display. I'll notify your father as soon as class is over."

* * *

On the stairway of his house, Fidget peeked around the banister, watching Basil Of Baker Street's every move as he talked on the phone with his teacher: "Why, Monsieur Victor, surely you _can't _mean...well, Fidget has been known to goof off in such bizarre manners. But I won't happen again, I can assure you...Yes, I will talk to him. Thank you so much, & _au revoir._"

No sooner had Basil hung up the phone, than Fidget had begun creeping back up the stairs to his room. But when his father called out his name sharply, Fidget knew he had to face the scolding he would most likely receive for his antics earlier. Sighing, Fidget flew down the stairs & landed clumsily in front of his father, who looked rather irritated, tapping his foot & glaring with his arms crossed.

Fidget only looked up to ask, "What did you wanna see me for, Papa?" Basil sighed, & made his exasperated reply: "Fidget, I'm quite sure you heard our conversation on the phone, so I suppose there's no need to explain further. Regardless, Monsieur Victor told me that you belched the Periodic Table Of Elements & disgusted your whole classroom. Fidget, to think I've taught you better!"

"I'm sorry, Papa," Fidget tried to apologize, "but I was just—"

"I don't need your excuses," Basil said flatly. "Now go up to your room & put up your video games. You're grounded for the night." Fidget, again, wanted to argue, but he decided that it was no use. Sighing, the little bat made his way up to his room & shut the door.

* * *

Night had come & gone, & now Basil was sitting in his chair, puffing on his pipe as he flipped through the pages of his copy of the morning paper. Suddenly, his ears perked up to the sound of a knock on the door. Adjusting his robe & going over to open the door, he was delighted to see a familiar rodent standing in the threshold. A plump figure in her later years, she was clad in a dashiki (which lay over her unusually-styled graying hair) & a dress with vibrant, colorful patterns.

"Ah, Gramsy," Basil said as he led the elderly woman into the living room, "how nice of you to visit!" Sitting down beside his friend on the plush purple couch, the detective asked, "Pray tell, what brings you here on this fine day?"

"Well, Fidget called last night, & told me about what had happened at school," Gramsy replied, briefly taking off her hat. "He also said he wanted to try & learn proper manners..."

"Well, Miss Mbale, I'm afraid I can't help you there," Basil interrupted. "Believe me, I've tried to teach him how to be a gentlerodent, but my attempts have been all in vain."

"I'm not finished, Basil," Gramsy said. "I wasn't able to find someone when he called, but I looked in the paper this morning, & I decided to give you the solution to your problem. Might I recommend taking Fidget to see Donald Trumpet?"

"Donald Trumpet?" Basil echoed. "Never heard of him."

"He runs a charm school in the South End," Gramsy explained. "A lot of students with the manners of a pig have attended his classes, & they came out with the manners of a debonair!"

"Do you think it'll work on Fidget?" Basil asked. All Gramsy could say was, "I can't make any promises, Basil. The only thing we can do is hope for the best."

* * *

Fidget had been taken by Basil to the charm school, & now he was staring into the sneering face of its owner. At 50 years old, Donald Trumpet was tall & burly, with brown fur, silvery-black hair with a moustache, stern green eyes, & whiskers & wrinkles on his face. His clothes were as strapping as he was; he wore a simple dark-blue suit, red necktie, white shirt, & brown shoes.

Fidget was intimidated by the formidable appearance of his new teacher; it was a relief for him to be able to see his father waving as he drove off for home & yelled happily, "Bye-bye, Fidget! Have a nice day at charm school!" Then the little bat looked back at Trumpet, gulping. He hoped this nightmare would end soon...

* * *

When he got into the main room of the charm school (which was really an elegant ballroom), Fidget was surprised, & a little relieved, to see some familiar faces. At least he wouldn't be suffering alone...

The first mouse he saw was around Basil's current age, at 30. A fancy-looking gentlemouse, he was dressed in a long purple jacket, shiny black shoes, & khaki trousers, with a rainbow chrome-studded shoulder-patch & a matching cravat that flowed freely over his lavender shirt. He had golden fur, teal eyes, & curly, Prince-style black hair.

The next two mice were little twins. The first one was a small, young, 9-year-old mouse boy, with gray fur, a cobalt-blue nose, & startling green eyes. He wore a heavy red-plaid jacket, olive-green trousers, a fuzzy brown floppy-snowcap, & black boots. The second twin, a girl, had white fur, malicious blue eyes, a pink nose, & golden curlilocks. She was dressed in a pink frilly dress, puffy white stockings, & a pink hair-bow.

The final mouse Fidget saw was a small boy, only a year older than Olivia. With light-tan fur, brown eyes, & coifed blackish-brown hair, he wore a fancy suit similar to the one Donald Trumpet wore, only in gray.

"Hi, Luciano," Fidget said with a smile as he went up to the boy. "What brings you here?"

"I know what you're thinking, Fidget," the Italian boy replied in his mild accent, "& no, I haven't suddenly turned rude or nothin'. I'm just here to make my manners even _more_ sophisticated so as to please the folks."

"Of course," Fidget said with a smile. "Dat's nice."

"Hey, Fidget!" The little bat turned around to see the boy dressed like a lumberjack glaring maliciously at him, along with his sister, as he taunted meanly, "What are _you_ in for?"

"Dat doesn't concern you, Rochester!" Fidget snapped. "Now mind your own freakin' beeswax! And dat goes for your sister, too!" The two twins burst into peals of demonic laughter, pointing & giggling at Fidget, who just glared, blew a raspberry, & pouted, before looking up at the rich mouse in the rainbow cravat, who had laid a paw on his shoulder.

"Don't let those little brats get to you, Fidget," the mouse said with a smile. "I'm sure they'll get what's coming to them one way or another!"

"I hope you're right, Sophocles," Fidget muttered darkly. Suddenly, all the rodents stood at attention, as Donald Trumpet came into the room, wielding a cane in his paws. Everyone only stood & stared as the middle-aged mouse barked in his Bill Cosby-type voice, "Good morning, & welcome to my charm school! I am Donald Trumpet, the owner & proprietor of this establishment!"

"Good morning, Mr. Trumpet," everyone greeted, the two twins with considerably less enthusiasm with the others. The instructor immediately turned around, pointing his ruler at the rodents who had gathered to see him, as he boomed, "When I call your name, kindly stand at attention! Sophocles Braveheart!"

The artisan in the rainbow cravat stood erect, saluting sharply as he cried, "Present, sir!"

"Willy & Ginny Rochester!" In response, the twins stuck their tongues out at Donald. Glaring, the professor snapped his fingers, & two burly thugs arrived, pulling on the twins' tongues until they began crying.

"Now, as I was saying...Luciano Mozzarello!"

"Present, Don Trumpet," the boy replied, smiling.

"Fidget Bat!"

Fidget, though intimidated by Donald once again, would not let himself be passive. Meekly going up to him & looking downcast, he said softly, "With all due respect, Mr. Trumpet, it's Fidget _Da _Bat." The little bat began quaking in his single shoe as Donald leaned in towards him, & snarled, "You best watch your back, Fidget. I _will _be watching you...& for that matter..._DON'T CORRECT ME!_" A spooked Fidget immediately nodded, then sat down in a nearby chair.

* * *

Meanwhile, back at Baker Street, 18-year-old Eliza McBride, dressed in a lime-green T-shirt (with a red peace sign on it), a fuschia pillbox hat, & blue bell-bottoms, was listening to the latest celebrity gossip from her friend Rebecca. Eliza pressed her face closer to the earpiece of her pink phone, eager to hear more of Rebecca's newest star story. "Hm-mmm...hm-mmm..." She gasped, & her face turned extremely shocked. "Oh, my God! Are you _SURE?_...OK, 'Becca, thanks for the story. Gotta go now. Bye." Then Eliza hung up, & lay on her bed, whining dismally, just as little Olivia Flaversham came in with her teddy bear, & held it up to her. "Snuggles wants to have a tea party with you," the girl said sweetly.

"Not now, Livvy!" Eliza ejaculated in exasperation. "Can't you see what horrible news I just got from Rebecca? _PRINCESS IS HAVING A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN!_"

"She's had them before," Olivia said. "It's nothing to worry about!"

"Yes, it is, Livvy!" Eliza cried. "She's so upset, she won't be able to make it to the variety show at the Rat Trap tonight!"

"Why don't we go to her house & try & cheer her up? Maybe that'll work!" Olivia suggested. To which Eliza made her frantic reply: "Livvy, you can't just go up to a celebrity's house & get in like that!"

"Princess is a friend of mine," Olivia said. "She'll be happy to let us see her!" Putting her teddy bear on Eliza's bed & going to put on her outside clothes, she said, "Come on, let's go get everyone! We could use their help!" Eliza sighed & rolled her eyes, before going to alert the rest of the Baker Street Kids of the situation at hand.

* * *

Just 30 minutes had passed since Fidget's arrival at Donald Trumpet's Charm School, & he was more miserable than Toby without his beloved bone. All morning, he had been pushed around & ordered like a soldier in the British army, & as you can imagine, he did not like it one bit. Now he was with his fellow charm students in a corner of the ballroom, with a table that was decorated with cups & a huge glass bowl of raspberry punch.

"Now," Donald Trumpet said in his sharp voice, "you are at a party, & you want to get some punch. What do you do?"

Proudly strolling over to the two thugs at the table, Sophocles bowed grandly, & said politely, "My good sirs, if you would be so kind as to move over a little, I hope you don't mind if I took the liberty of collecting some drink for myself." The thugs smiled a little, then moved over. Sophocles took a cup of punch, & sipped it delicately, his pinky finger in the air.

Willy & Ginny, however, weren't as polite. The twins rudely pushed the thugs aside; the brutish mice, in retaliation, tugged them away by the ears (rather painfully).

When Luciano had done his turn, Fidget went up to the two thugs, & cleared his throat. "Excuse me," he said meekly. No response. "_Excuse me..._" When the thugs didn't move, a cross Fidget stomped his only foot in irritation as he shouted, "_GEEZ, ARE YOU DEAF? I SAID FREAKIN' CLEARLY, EXCUSE ME!_"

Fidget was immediately taken by the ear, as Donald dragged him into a room & locked the door. Sophocles & Luciano watched on worriedly, but the Rochester Twins laughed snidely. "Looks like poor Fidget's going in for the film!" Willy chortled.

* * *

The noon sky shone over the London streets, as Olivia, Eliza, & the other Baker Street Kids made their way to Greenfield Courts in a human's hansom cab.

"So, what is it with Princess again?" asked Ratigan as he snacked on a cookie.

"I told you, Ratigan, she has a nervous breakdown!" Eliza moaned in dismay. "Blimey, are you daft or what?"

"Hey, I got better things to do besides read the latest crad about stars from phony tabloids," Ratigan retorted with an irritated frown.

"For your information, Rebecca told me about that!" Eliza snapped angrily.

"I'm surprised she doesn't just go to a doctor for some medicine," Jane said.

"The only doctor in the house is Doctor Fink, & he's not even a real doctor!" Gadget explained flatly in response to Jane. Just then, the hansom jolted to a stop at the grand entrance to the Greenfield Courts house.

"We're here, girls," Eliza said solemnly as she looked at the grand estate's silhouette in the approaching fog.

And so the Baker Street Kids made their way to the Rochester house—a great big purple mansion. Eliza gulped at the sheer size at the house. Giggling nervously, she pushed Olivia over to the front door. With a look of sure confidence on her face, Olivia rang the bell. A chime that sounded weirdly like the opening keyboard riff from "1999" echoed eerily through the foggy grounds. Then the door opened. A kindly old lady with graying hair & pretty clothes stood in the threshold.

"Hello, Miss Flaversham," the lady said kindly in a Hattie McDaniel-like voice, before asking with a smile, "How are you doing today?"

Olivia said merrily, "I'm doing fine, Mrs. Rochester. My siblings & I came to see Princess."

"Oh, she's right upstairs in her room," Maddie said gently. "You sure you don't need any help getting up there?"

"No thanks, Mrs. Rochester," Julie said as she followed the kids. "We're quite fine." Olivia & the Baker Street Kids made their way to Princess' room via a golden glass elevator, before stepping inside.

Princess' bedroom was, needless to say, the biggest room in the whole mansion. The walls were painted a bright pink, & the carpet was a soft lavender. Pictures, photos, & posters of Princess & her band (The American Revolution) covered the walls. A large bookcase with plenty of reading material (as well as a few mementos) lay in the northwest corner of the room, right by an indoor veranda with a large square window overlooking the city of London. A large crystal chandelier hung from the domed ceiling. A large stage, complete with musical instruments, a microphone, & amplifiers, was on the east wall. Countless assortments of various toys & games rested neatly in large drawers, cabinets, boxes, bags, trunks, chests, & satchels. A small, ornate vanity rested on the south wall, next to a large fuschia chaise lounge. A large canopy bed with curtains, satin sheets, & fluffy pillows rested on the west wall.

In fact, Princess herself was occupying that canopy bed right now.

29-year-old Princess had pale chocolate-colored fur, beautiful (but red-rimmed) violet eyes, a runny pink nose, big drooping pink ears, drooping whiskers, long light eyelashes, a voluptuous body, a bucktooth, & long raven-black hair, which she normally had in a wacky hairdo, but was now letting down freely. Today she wasn't wearing her low-cut fuschia V-neck blouse, tight purple pants, & fuschia symbol medallion; she was just wearing her pajamas. Not to mention she was weeping & blowing her nose into a handkerchief.

"I know you don't wanna go to the concert tonight, Princess," the singer's Australian drummer said in her lovely accent, "but you promised Evelyn. And you know how she can't stand people who don't keep their word about things..."

"Look, Minnie, she's sick with a cold! I'm sure Evelyn will understand," the drummer's twin brother, Mickey, shouted in irritation, as he put a wet washcloth on Princess' forehead.

"I thought you said she had a nervous breakdown!" Olivia whispered harshly to Eliza, who began to blush profusely.

"Who said that?" Princess asked in a stuffy voice.

Jimmy Jam, a burly mouse who looked a little like Ice Cube, looked over, & said, "It's just the kids from Baker Street."

"Let 'em come in," Princess said stuffily.

Just before the kids could go over to Princess, however, they were stopped by a tall, brown-haired mouse in green surgical clothes.

"Hold it!" the mouse barked as he held out a latex-gloved hand. "First we have to inspect them..."

"Here he goes again!" Minnie moaned as she rolled her eyes.

The mouse who looked like a doctor carefully began to check the children for any diseases. The doctor mouse opened Ratigan's eyelids widely, revealing his yellow glazzies. "No pink eye..." He tugged on Julie's ear & let it snap, making Julie yelp in pain. "No ear infections..." He pressed gently on Gadget's neck. "No sore throat..." He pulled out one of Olivia's hairs, making her wince. "No cancer! All clear!"

The kids then began to make their way towards Princess, before the mouse stopped them again. "Wait! I almost forgot!" the doctor-like mouse realized, before whipping out an industrial-sized can of disinfectant. After shaking it up a bit, he put his gloved finger on the trigger, & got ready to spray.

"You might wanna close your eyes," the mouse-physician warned, before spraying disinfectant all over the kids, making them gag & cough. "There! Now you're clean!" the doctor-mouse said with a satisfied smile.

Olivia dusted off her clothes, & asked in mild irritation, "Do you _always_ have to do this when we visit you guys?"

"Hey," the mouse known as "Doctor" Ratt Fink said with a sly grin, "as long as I go by the name 'Doctor', why not put my image to good use?"

* * *

Fidget struggled against his restraints, as he was strapped to an actually-quite-comfortable chair of tortures. Donald Trumpet made sure to be careful as he pried the little bat's eyes open with lidlocks, & placed a strange-looking helmet with electrodes & wires on his head. As he prepared Fidget for what he was about to see, he said solemnly, "You see, Fidget, I'm not doing this to make you suffer. On the contrary, you're about to learn a great deal from this movie."

When Fidget had been properly secured, Donald went over to a projector, & started up an old film. On the screen, a black-&-white movie began to play as cheerful orchestral music started up. Fidget wanted to fall asleep immediately, but the lidlocks were prying his eyes open, so he could not close them, no matter how hard he tried. All he could do was watch reluctantly as a little mouse boy appeared on the screen, & an announcer began to drone on about good manners & other such things.

Fidget began to sweat nervously, as Donald turned up the sound & his eyes were almost-literally glued to the screen. Whatever torture Trumpet had in store for him, he hoped he could get through it without going insane...

* * *

Meanwhile, Princess & the others were still upstairs, but the Baker Street Kids were downstairs with the Rochester Family for their noon tea.

"It's no use, Mrs. Rochester," Olivia lamented as she took a cheese crumpet & dunked it in her tea. "Princess just doesn't want to come out of her room."

"She's depressed, dear," Maddie replied empathically. "Wouldn't you wanna stay in bed if you were that sad?"

"But such emotions aren't good for her," Ratigan said firmly. "We need to find a way to get her ready for the Rat Trap concert tonight. And we have to do it fast; it's almost afternoon."

"It won't do any good," Ally Rochester said, shaking her head. "It takes forever to get Princess back on her feet again. And I should know; I speak from experience."

Gadget thought a moment, then brightened. "I've got an idea! Why don't we go to the Rat Trap & get the performers to come to the house? Maybe they can cheer Princess up!"

"I guess we got nothin' to lose," Roger Rochester said, getting up out of his chair. "I'll go get the car," he added as he walked off.

* * *

"Poor little Fidget!" Sophocles said, shaking nervously. "I do hope he comes out of conditioning all right!"

"I doubt it," Willy scoffed. "He'll probably be a zombie by the time that movie's over!" Suddenly, the door to the office opened. Fidget came out...but instead of having a ghastly complexion & glazed-over eyes (as Willy & Ginny expected), he bore a smile as he waved & said, "Good afternoon, friends! My, you look lovely today!"

Sophocles blinked. Luciano gaped open in shock. The Rochester Twins immediately fainted, as Fidget watched on & said before walking off, "Oh, my, I'd better fetch you a glass of water! Can't have you adorable things dirtying up the nice, clean floors!"

"Is it just me," Luciano said aside to Sophocles, "or is Fidget acting a little _too _polite?"

"As gentlemousely as I am, I'm afraid this is a bit much," Sophocles replied. "But it's for the best; after all, no one wants to see Fidget going around, belching the alphabet or something crude like that...regardless, I'm sure he'll be quite fine."

"I sure hope you're right, _Signor _Braveheart," Luciano said, looking a bit anxious.

* * *

"This is hopeless," Princess sniffled, drying her moist eyes with a lavender lace handkerchief. "I'll never get out of this breakdown!" She blew her nose, & collapsed in Doctor's arms, sobbing.

"Cheer up, Princess," Olivia said, smiling. "We brought some friends over to help you!" She gestured to the Rat Trap Crew, who were smiling & waving at Princess. The pop star didn't bother to smile or wave back. She just slumped over on her bed, wailing. Olivia knew that was her cue. "Donnie," she whispered, "play it!" With that, Don The Pianist played a jolly tune on his piano as Jiggy The Octopus did his juggling routine, tapping his way around the room. But much to the Baker Street Kids' dismay, Jiggy's attempts failed miserably. The octopus frowned, then slumped away, dragging his rainbow juggling balls & straw hat along the ground as he did.

"Now what do we do?" Eliza complained. Julie thought a moment, then smiled in enlightenment as she snapped her fingers. She gave a gesture, & Miss Kitty & her sisters began to dance as they sang their rendition of "Stoney End" by Barbra Streisand. But that didn't work either. Princess continued to cry hysterically, pounding her fists on her pillow.

"Well, we're out of ideas," Bridget said, shrugging defeatedly.

"Wait a second!" Gadget said, brightening. "You guys take care of Princess; everyone else, follow me! I know just where we can get help!"

* * *

Much to Luciano's surprise, Fidget didn't turn out to be a zombie after all. In fact, he seemed pretty normal throughout the rest of the day, even though the extreme politeness was a tad out of character for him. However, Fidget soon reached his breaking point...

The afternoon was beginning to end, & the charm school enrollees were preparing to go through their last test to see if they were fit to graduate. Sophocles & Luciano had passed their "Etiquiz", but Fidget was having a little trouble remembering where his utensils went on the grand dining table they all sat at. To make matters worse, Willy & Ginny were smiling maliciously as they watched him fumble & bumble.

"Come on, Fidget," Willy taunted, "what are you, chicken?"

"Yeah," Ginny added with a sneer, "you're too scared to use your silverware properly! Man, you're such a wimp!"

"I'm surprised you even passed those last few tests!" Willy mocked. "You must have cheated or something!" The twins' snickers & jeers echoed in Fidget's brain like voices against a cavern wall. His head was starting to hurt with such negative thoughts, & he tried to block out the twins' malicious insults with his webbed hands on his ears. But the damage had been done. Huffing, a crazed Fidget ripped off his bow-tie & tuxedo, revealing his regular clothes underneath.

Upon seeing his pupil react in such a manner, Donald Trumpet's eyes went wide. "Fidget," he scolded, "kindly put those clothes back on & finish your test!" Scampering across the table, out of the room, down the corridor, & out of the school, Fidget taunted, "You gotta catch me first!" Laughing crazily, he flew into the air, heading for Rochester Mansion. Trumpet attempted to catch him, but it was no use. Sighing in exasperation, he went into his office & prepared to call Basil. Fidget was going to be in _big_ trouble, that was for sure...

* * *

Meanwhile, the Baker Street Kids were just about to head out for the charm school, but Fidget had arrived at the gates of Rochester Mansion before they could even make it there. "Fidget!" cried a surprised Gadget. "How'd _you_ get here so quickly?"

"No time to explain, Gadget!" Fidget said, rushing into the house. "Princess needs help, & I'm the only one who can give it to her!" The Baker Street Kids followed Fidget into Princess' room, & watched as Fidget began to tell a joke:

"OK, so dere's a pirate, right? He has dis friend with a wooden leg named Smith. So he tells da captain about it, & da captain says, 'What's da name of his other leg?'" For a moment, nobody laughed. Then Princess suddenly smiled & began to let out a few giggles. Soon her laughter became wilder & more hysterical, until she got tired & had to wipe the tears of joy from her eyes. A smiling Fidget was just about to go up to Princess & accept her thanks, but before he could, Basil & Donald Trumpet appeared suddenly.

"I can explain!" Fidget cried, then suddenly, he realized he couldn't quite understand why he had gone into such a frenzy. "Actually...I really can't," he added sheepishly.

"Fidget, my boy..."—Donald Trumpet smiled—"...you seem to have gone past your phase of crude humor." Taking Fidget by the wing, he added warmly, "Now, why don't we go back to the school & fix your other odd habits? And don't worry, those nasty twins won't bother you anymore..."

* * *

A week had passed, & Fidget had graduated from Donald Trumpet's charm school with honors. Now the new-&-improved bat was with his beloved Cecelia Green, telling her another joke he had come up with: "So Basil & Dr. Dawson are at this crime scene, right? Basil makes his deductions about what happened. Dawson says, 'My word, Basil, where did you learn all this?' And Basil replies, 'Elementary school, my dear Dawson!'" The two bats laughed a little, & once again, it was Cecelia's giggles that made Fidget's ears ring with joy. 


End file.
